RAP

            SINGH'N RAP


   Now this is a story all about Jeet
   Who lived on New York's 14th Street


   He graduated from college with a masters degree
   In a field known as anthropology


   He soon got a job in a research lab
   But always complained "why's life so drab!"


   He was constantly surrounded by geeks and nerds
   With e equals m c squared their only words


   He was a hard-core desi, I must say
   But his wildest spirits were being kept at bay


   Our desi veer could take this no more
   So he decided to knock on his neighbor's door


   His neighbor was a girl of Italian descent
   Who spoke with an intriguing Brooklyn accent


   Her name was Gina
   And I wish I had seen 'er
   Cause the way he had described her
   Any guy would dig her!


   Jeet and Gina started to date
   And would hangout together till pretty late


   "Meri Gori, Meri Sohni Gori" was all he'd say
   "No one can come in between us - no way!"


   But notorious Aunty Chugalkhor was on the prowl
   She sensed something in the air - was it foul?


   Oh yes yes yes -
   She was definitely in luck
   This, of all her stories
   Would be a slam dunk!


   She spotted her nephew in the mall
   And that too ... oh gori de naal !!!
   (AYE HAYE! Oh HO!)


   Well that surely did make Aunty's day
   A successful field day for her, I must say!


   She headed straight back home to make a call
   Undoubtedly to Jeet's mum in Balowall


   Jeet's mum could not believe her ears
   "Oh mera beta," she cried, wiping her tears


   She tried and tried to get hold of Jeet
   But each time she'd call his answerer would beep!


   Where on earth could the dude be?
   Well that's your imagination -
   Don't ask me!


   Mum's patience finally started running out
   So she left a message giving him the clout


   "Oh JINNY GORI noo chhadd dey
   Te vapas aja aithay!"


   Jeet was obviously taken by surprise
   Who the hell had blown his guise?


   But now was not the time to guess
   He had to quickly get outta this mess


   He drummed up the courage to call his mum
   But before he could speak,
   someone shouted "YOU BUM!"


   Of course it was mother in a terrible mood
   And now was not the time to be a dude!


   "OH tu Amrika vich kee karda phirda
   Murrh ke aja te tera viah kardiyay aithay
   Ik kurrhi hagayee barrhee piyarree
   Te puree seva karugee teyree!"


   But Jeet was clearly not impressed
   It was Gina with whom he was so obsessed


   He told his mum that that was no deal
   And that his piyaar for Gina was the one for real


   Once again mother hit the roof
   She could not believe that
   Jeet was such a goof!


   She hung up the phone
   And in the harshest of tones cried
   "Mundiya - you're now on your own."


   Just the next day ...
   Jeet and Gina tied the knot
   And their happiness together was easy to spot


   The days went on ...
   But with hardly a year gone ...


   Jeet Singh started to realize
   What was happening
   To his wallet's size!


   Was Gina just after his money?
   Or did she really mean it
   When she'd say "Oh honey!"


   A few rotten thoughts crossed his mind
   But he thought he was simply just going blind


   But one sad day, Gina spilled the beans
   She said she was leaving for New Orleans


   She had met a guy called Tom,
   And so wanted a divorce
   Which left our young veer in such remorse


   He remembered his mum's favorite words:
   "Goreeyan da koee parosa nayee hunda"
   And thought to himself:
   "Wasn't I a brainless munda"



   The divorce settlement did take place
   And he lost half his assets -
   Let alone his face!


   His despair could always be seen in his eyes
   But everyone knows that "desiness" never dies


   He soon met Mad-Mats who taught him to rhyme
   And ever since then:
   "ARRANGED MARRIAGE, BUSS ARRANGED MARRIAGE"
    - has been his constant chime !!!!!!