They are calm.
I, however, am an emotional mess.
It is the morning of Aug. 28, 2017, at 8:28 a.m. The first day of kindergarten for my twin daughters, who turn 6 in October.
In just a few minutes, for the first time in
http://www.cheappatriotssale.com/shop-by-players-jimmy-garoppolo-jersey-c-1_29.html their lives, they will go to the public elementary school in my town. They will ride the bus to and from there.
And the journey will have officially started.
We took them shopping and as they carefully considered lots of different clothes, shoes and sparkly backpacks, I was fine.
There was an orientation meeting at the school and we took them to meet their teachers, see where their classrooms were and learn where to get on and off the bus. I was fine.
And then it was the morning and we are walking them to where the bus picks them up and they slowly get on. They have excitement and fear in their eyes and as they sit down in the second row together and look at me ... I just lose it.
One of them is shy. Already too smart for her own good, she's the prankster, often in her own world, very opinionated, a total mush ball and easily distracted. She's 5 going on 15, constantly in her mom's closet figuring out what she's going to wear. She's the one that's going to give me trouble in high school, I already know it.
The other is the social one. Quick to make friends at a park, playground or someone's house, she's the rule follower, she's super considerate of everyone else, she's the one who shares, hyper aware of everything, she has no problem putting her foot down, hands on her little hips and letting us know what needs to happen. She's also five minutes older, so she takes the responsibility of being the "older sister" very seriously, often telling the other that she can have her dessert or that they need to watch what she wants, because "that's what big sisters do."
hey are beautiful and brilliant and maddening and unique and frustrating and puzzling and fantastic and insane and have me completely and
http://www.dolphinsjerseyofficial.com/shop-by-players-31-michael-thomas-jersey-c-1_16.html totally wrapped around their fingers.
And as of 10 days ago, they are no longer mine.
They went to a daily preschool together, a half-day thing five minutes from our house, but otherwise have been at home with my wife up until this year and so, even with the caveat that they are twins, they are very close. Sharing private jokes, not wanting to sleep unless the other one is in the room with them, they are inseparable.
The shy one always relies on the other to include her and bring her into play at playgrounds and parties. The "big sister," poor thing, inherited her father's awful eyesight (I wear contacts), so she wears glasses and sometimes is self-conscious about them. She leans on her younger sister for self-confidence and reassurance.
And now, at least in school, they won't anymore. We decided -- and by we, I really mean my wife decided and I didn't fight it -- that we would split them up. It's what the school and other parents of twins recommend, so right or wrong, we're doing it.
I feel that way all the time. Right or wrong, we are doing "it," whatever "it" may be, in raising the girls.
I am sure this will be of no surprise to anyone who has read me for any amount of time, but I have no idea what I am doing when it comes to parenting. And as the girls grow older, that's only going to become more apparent. To them and to me.
I often feel helpless, unsure of what to do, as my two little beans look to me for answers and guidance and everything a little girl wants from her daddy. Attention and love, I've got down pat. It's just everything else that's a question mark.
But at least, as I fumble my way through that, it was self-contained. In our own little world, their mother and I, their brothers and some friends. It was a self-contained world, where the worst thing that happens to them is we run
Tracy Porter Womens Jersey out of apple juice.
And that ended 10 days ago. I know I have to share them with the real world.
They're ready. I'm not.
