AS I MATURE

   I've learned that you cannot make
   someone love you. All you can do is
   stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

   I've learned that no matter how
   much I care, some people are just
   ass****s.

   I've learned that it takes years
   to build up trust, and it only takes
   suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

   I've learned that you can get by
   on charm for about fifteen minutes.
   After that, you'd better have a
   big weenie or huge boobs.

   I've learned that you shouldn't
   compare yourself to others - they are
   more screwed up than you think.

   I've learned that we are responsible
   for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

   I've learned that regardless of how
   hot and steamy a relationship is at first,
   the passion fades, and there had
   better be a lot of money to take its place.

   I've learned that the people you care most
   about in life are taken from you too soon
   and all the less important ones just never
   go away.