I have a 12 year old son finds it terribly difficult to listen to me. If i want him to
do
something http://www.authenticsteelersstore.com/Steelers-Jordan-Berry-Draft-Jersey/ ,
I have to go up to him and put my hand on his shoulder and say to him, "Sammy,
look at me with your eyes". It's as if no-one is home inside of him sometimes.
He truly doesn't hear me. Therefore I don't expect him to answer me if I am not
infront of him. Many would disagree with this but that is the way I deal with
Sam.
Sam is an individual and as such needs to be treated differently than my other three kids. He is mildly ADHD and I need ot allow for
that http://www.authenticsteelersstore.com/Steelers-Jon-Bostic-Draft-Jersey/ ,
even though I don;t let it become an excuse. With htis child, I choose to focus
on other more important things in his life.
Whereas I have a 14 year old who is not ADD or ADHD and I know is capable of much, much more than his other
brothers. Therefore I hold him to a much higher standard. This is my choice. I
have always told me children that they are individuals and as such I will treat
them as individuals.
This year Sam is playing soccer but my other three are not. That is my choice. He has a flair for soccer and practices harder and
is more passionate than the others about the game I decided to give him that
opportunity above the others. It beats me how Sam can always be concentrating
when the ball is near him but when I say somethign to him he just doesn't hear
me. But that's the way he
is http://www.authenticsteelersstore.com/Steelers-John-Stallworth-Draft-Jersey/ ,
so I make ammends for him and use different strategies for him.
With my other children, I expect them to jump when I ask them to do something. They are
capable of that so I require it of them. Sometimes I still have to get down to
Rebekah's level (she is nine years old). If she was playing a gam,e and I needed
her I would tend to go to her to make sure I had her attention.
As a rule I do not call out to my kids through the
house http://www.authenticsteelersstore.com/Steelers-Joe-Haden-Draft-Jersey/ ,
however, if I did there would be a very good reason for it (such as the house
was on fire or I was stuck). If you model not calling out to your kids through
the house you will find that they will start to copy you. Whatever you do, you
can bet your kids will do the same. This can be very good sometimes but it can
actually work against you if you are not careful.
We need to model listening to our kids and this one thing you can be very sure of: if you never
listen to your kids they will not listen to you. This is worth remembering. You
have no right to expect your child to listen to you if don't listen to them in
return.
Remember http://www.authenticsteelersstore.com/Steelers-Joe-Greene-Draft-Jersey/ ,
being a parent is not about dictatorship as some parents believe, rather it is a
two way communication between parent and child, whereby your child has the right
to request choices and privileges from you.
I hope this helps parents just a little. Listen to your child and they will listen to you in return.
Author's Resource Box
Kim Patrick is a single mum with four children who lives on the Sunshine Coast in
Queensland http://www.authenticsteelersstore.com/Steelers-Joe-Gilliam-Draft-Jersey/ ,
Australia. She is author of the book, Get Your Child To Behave In 30 Days Or
Less. For more information on how to get your child to behave, you can go to
http:www.mychildcanbehavemain
Article Source:
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