TT is SAD today

Today is the worst day of my life, I dont know Why I am feeling pain today. Allah has given me all that a person can imagine a Quality education ,Loving family, a sweet naughty girl who is going to be mine in few months, But Why i am seeing my self in Past, Why i am feeling that some thing is missing.My relatives are happy today but Why I am sad??My cousions are getting Married I must be happy and congratulate them but Why I am unable to call them?? Why my eyes are shedding tears ????Why I take off from office??? Why I am listening sad songs ??Why I am thinking that i am not supposed to think???Why I am doing so


I know If my family know my internal feelings then what would be the impact on them.

I know If my fiancee knows abut my thoughts then her heart would be broken But I cant control my heart to weap.