A man walks into a barber shop and asks; "how much for a hair cut?" The barber said $12.50. The man asks; "and how much for a shave?" The barber said $1.50. The man then says SHAVE IT ALL.
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A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him. The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe her. He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face." The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report. She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"
Age: 124
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Teacher:"What is your name?". Student:"Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai." Teacher:"When I ask a question in English, answer it in english." Student:"My name is Sunlight.
Teacher :Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.Everyone must attend it. Raju:No ma'm! I will not be able to attend it. Teacher :Why? Raju:My mother will not allow me to go so far!!!
Age: 124
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American told sardar : Hamare desh me 90% shaadi e-mail se hoti hai. Sardar : Kya bath hai. Hamari desh me 100% female se hoti hai.
Where were you born ? sardar : Punjab. Boss : which part ? sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.
Sardar : What is the name of your car ? Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T". Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.
Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why are you removing a wheel from your auto. sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler
Interviewer : When is your birthday. Sardar : 13th Oct. Interviewer : which year ? sardar : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car. Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing. sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more.
Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any one before you die? Patient : Yes. A good doctor.
On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring. Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening. Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright
Age: 36
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United Arab Emirates, United Arab Emirates
On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring. Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening. Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright
Age: 124
6559 days old here
Total Posts: 47628
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Location:
United Kingdom, United Kingdom
Once a man was waiting for a taxi.
A beggar came along and asked him for some money. The man ignored him. But being a professional, the beggar kept on pestering him. The man became irritated when he realized that the beggar would not leave him alone unless he parts with some money.
Suddenly an idea struck him.He told the beggar, "I do not have money, but if you tell me what you want to do with the money, I will certainly help you." "I would have bought a cup of tea", replied the beggar.
The man said, "Sorry man. I can offer you a cigarette instead of tea". He then took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and offered one to the beggar.
The beggar told, "I don't smoke as it is injurious to health."
The man smiled and took a bottle of whisky from his pocket and told the beggar, "Here, take this bottle and enjoy the stuff. It is really good".
The beggar refused by saying, "Alcohol muddles the brain and damages the liver".
The man smiled again. He told the beggar, "I am going to the race course.Come with me and I will arrange for some tickets and we will place bets. If we win, you take the whole amount and leave me alone".
As before, the beggar politely refused the latest offer by saying, "Sorry sir, I can't come with you as betting on horses is a bad habit."
Suddenly the man felt relieved and asked the beggar to come to his home with him. Finally, the beggar's face lit up in anticipation of receiving at least something from the man. But he still had his doubts and asked the man, "Why do you want me to go to your house with you".
The man replied, "My wife always wanted to see how a man with no bad habits looks like
Age: 124
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Afghanistan, Afghanistan
eshajam said:
On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring. Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening. Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright