~CHANDNI~
Age: 124
7839 days old here
Total Posts: 56416
Points: 0
Location:
United Kingdom, United Kingdom
The new elementary school counselor was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other. She approached and asked if the girl was all right. The girl said she was fine.
A little while later, however, the counselor noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself. Approaching again, she offered,
"Would you like me to be your friend?"
The girl hesitated, then said,
"Okay," looking at the woman suspiciously.
Feeling she was making progress, the counselor then asked,
"Why are you standing here all alone?"
The little girl heaved a sigh of great exasperation and said,
"Because . . . I'm the goalie!"
~CHANDNI~
Age: 124
7839 days old here
Total Posts: 56416
Points: 0
Location:
United Kingdom, United Kingdom
,"Jokes are always just jokes ,they can never be a reality".... .... :)
now its safe to read on......
Every man should get married some time; after all,
happiness is not the only thing in life!! --Anonymous
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Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair
that some men should be happier than others --Oscar Wilde
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Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
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I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years. --Sam Kinison
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A psychiatrist is a person who will give you
expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
--Anonymous
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Bachelors know more about women than married men;
if they didn't, they'd be married too.
--H. L. Mencken
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Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
they marry later;for another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken
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"A man without a woman is like a fish without a
bicycle." - U2
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Marriage is a three-ring circus:
--engagement ring
--wedding ring
--suffering
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When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows
why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone
wonders why.
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Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
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When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
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I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back to home always.--Anonymous
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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary? " She said,"Somewhere I have never been!" I told her,
"How about the kitchen?"--Anonymou s
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We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
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My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.--Anonymou s
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She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.Then
the mud fell off.--Anonymous
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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too
late for the garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
--Anonymous
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Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to get to married.
He says "the wedding rings look like minature
handcuffs... .."--Anonymous
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u
let him in!--Anonymous
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A man placed some flowers on the grave of his
dearly parted mother and started back toward his car when his
attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The
man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept
repeating, 'Why did u have to die? Why did you have to die?"
The first man approached him and said,"Sir, I don't wish to
interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain in
is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so?
Deeply? A child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to collect
himself, then replied "My wife's first husband."
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A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over,
made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish,
too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.
The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled " It really works ! "