Location:
United Arab Emirates, United Arab Emirates
Although consumed by fury, you still loved us. At least that is the knowledge of my heart. Screaming like a child, you would beat us Until you snapped, and then the tears would start. "You know I love you," you would cry, demanding More of us through tears than with your fist. And we, through tears, would nod our understanding, Too bullied in our pain to dare resist. Yet now that you've been dead for many years, And I have wandered through my own vast hell, I see the desperate anguish in your tears And hope at last that I can love you well. For only in my love can your love be The love that once, I think, you had for me.
Age: 124
6560 days old here
Total Posts: 47628
Points: 0
Location:
United Kingdom, United Kingdom
Who have I become? What have I given up today? How much has changed? These questions, famous for being rhetorical, yet they long to be answered. My tears even now are forced, when yours are never switched off.
Hurt and me go hand in hand; If I can't damage me, I'll damage you. Rip you up and not regret, not regret you, Only me, it's always me. And I am no one.
Oblivion, I welcome you, rape me again. Every time I think of the boys you're there. Make me the next murderer's victim. Please be painful and last for hours.
Where did my heart go? I long to pinpoint the time I turned so cold. Every time I think I'm loved, it's always my own doing. And now no one will want to know me.
I lie. Never in my bed, always in other people's. Make me sodomised, and I hope he lies, and says he loves me. Make me fall in love and have my heart ripped out my arse. Soft kisses and stales tears are cracking the skin on my face.
Out of this world, all that I feel. Any thing that ever made me care, ever made me realise how special life is; Has left out an unseen back door, and gone. I know it won't return without persuasion but every word I say is dead.
Friends no longer know me. I don't really know friends. One is there, still he cares, still we have those tell-tale signs of eternal mateship. But the rest are hazy, and it's only around me. I don't think we have that essential ingredient, comfortability.
It used to be so easy, love and be loved. What's so impossible? Consumed with paranoia, with having no comfort zone. Who do I miss the most? All of them that's who. But even that is a lie, the one I miss the most, whose friendship will never mend is holding the pen right now.
So cold. This winter has been icy as a snow flake. And where am I going? And what are my roots? And when will I die? And where are my family? And why death? And how? And religion, where are you? And why is futility the only thing that makes sense?
And why do we not care any more? And why is there gossip and lies about the ones we love? And who else feels like this? And who else has so many questions? And why? And am I dead now? And if so, why do I feel I still have so much more death to go? And will I get over this? And is anyone listening? And do they care?
Age: 124
6560 days old here
Total Posts: 47628
Points: 0
Location:
United Kingdom, United Kingdom
Repetitive You have NO idea Silent suffering Naive Keep going To ruin your life Leave me behind NO ONE will ever support you as much as me NO ONE will ever care about you as much as i did And NO ONE will ever feel as badly as i do......
Age: 124
6560 days old here
Total Posts: 47628
Points: 0
Location:
United Kingdom, United Kingdom
With a tear-streaked face I smile as if nothing is wrong and everything is ok But what my heart says can never be described My misery is disguised behind my empty eyes I cry until my face burns bright I scream until my ears stop the pitch from ringing and I plead with something or someone to end all my pain My anger is taken out on myself,My soul is crying for help and my heart is tattered to pieces My lips will not speak my pain nor will they mention any hint of emotion What you see about me is only what you want to see, You'll never know the real me.
Age: 36
6332 days old here
Total Posts: 15689
Points: 0
Location:
United Arab Emirates, United Arab Emirates
This heart of mine would surely die And my body would wither by and by But my love for you will go on and on. Yes, it will still be there after I`m gone.
You will feel me on the soft gentle breeze As you wander through the tall forest trees. I will be on the beach as the tide comes in That will remind you how easy my heart was to win.
You will go about your work and play And remember how you loved me one day. Love is so strong, the heart is weak. The tears will flow, the eyes will leak.
No, I never wanted to go away. But without your love no reason to stay. Even if you took your love from me I would forever in your heart be.
The angels will come and sing you a song They will tell you how I`m getting along. They will whisper about my love for you And let you know my heart is being true.
So, if that time should ever come to be And you say, "I`ll love you again," you will see The mountains, beaches and meadows will know. As you shout, "I`m sorry I ever let you go."