Lil' Brother Babysitting
Ok, My parents weren't home and I had to stay and baby-sit my little brother Timmy. So, I decided we'd go out back since it was a nice day. But, I was expecting call from my crush Nathan so I brought the phone out with me.

We got out the kick ball and started to play in the back yard. It was difficult for me because I was wearing these huge jnco brand pants that were 3 sizes too big for me. Timmy kicked the ball right on top of the roof of our house and I knew dad would blow up if he found out, because he specifically told us not too.

With the phone in my back pocket, I grabbed the ladder and climbed up it to the roof, I had done it before when hanging Christmas lights. I reached further and further for the ball, and as I reached Timmy ran up onto the 2nd floor patio right beside the ladder. (He got there from the inside.) I was so furious with Timmy at the moment for kicking the ball up there I kept yelling and yelling all of a sudden the phone rang but when I reached for it if slipped a bit! I caught myself three rings lower, one hand on the patio rail, one foot on the ladder.

I was so scared to move, but my baggy pants fell down! I was so frustrated that I yelled at Timmy that it was his entire fault and when he got fed up with me he ran around back climbed the ladder to where I was and pulled my panties down! I was mortified but still screaming at Timmy to get me down.

My crush who lived a block down from me decided to walk up to the house when I didn't answer the telephone. He cut up through the yards and into the backyard where I was standing with my bare butt andxxxxx. He had to help me down but he definitely was looking!

Submitted by Ashley

Cheerleading Camp

This one time I was at school cheerleading camp working on all the moves and jumps. A really cute guy I liked was watching too on the sidelines. I tried to impress him by looking really good. But as I got ready to do my next exercise, I realized I was about to go pee any second. I tried to hold it in, but as I ran up to do a flip, my skirt and top came off leaving me completely naked as I let out this huge fart and pee went gushing and squirting out of my xxxxxxxx in mid air. I was so embarrassed that I stood there peeing and farting naked for almost 5 minutes

Submitted by Anoymous

jupiterblue said:

I sent flowers to someone who was moving to Florida for a job promotion. I also sent flowers the same day to a funeral for a friend. I found out later that the flower shop got the cards mixed up. They sent the card to the guy who was moving that said, "Deepest Condolences," and sent the card to the funeral home that said, "I know it's hot where you're going, but you deserve it."

good one

tera kakh na rahay yep the beauty of Khalid masood sahib

I have posted it some days before

ok ok do not weep I will offer three to all of u

Ok,let me tell them

but expensive

A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.

The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?"
Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the
third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the
third-grade too!"


The teacher had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.


While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the
principal what the situation was. The principal told the teacher he would
give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was
to go back to the first-grade and behave. The teacher agreed. Harry was
Brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take
the test.


Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9"

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36"


And so it went with every question the principal thought a third- grade
should know. The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think
Harry can go to the third-grade.

"The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?" The
principal and Harry both agree.

Teacher: "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Harry: "Legs"

Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" (The
principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
Harry: "Pockets"

Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants"

Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious
and contains thin whitish liquid?" (The principal's eyes open really wide
and before he could stop the answer...)
Harry: "Coconut"

Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
Harry: "Bubblegum"

Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a
dog does on three legs?" (The principal's eyes open really wide and before
he could stop the answer...)
Harry: "Shake hands"

Teacher: "Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?"
Harry: "Yup"

Teacher: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I
get wet before you do"
Harry: "Tent"

Teacher: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first" (Principal was looking restless and a bit
tense)
Harry: "Wedding Ring"


Teacher: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me,
you feel good"
Harry: "Nose"

Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver"
Harry: "Arrow"

Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of
excitement?"
Harry: "Fire truck"

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put his ass
in the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself

A police recruit was asked on an exam:

"What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?"

In the blank, he wrote:

"Call for backup."

very old

School Mooning
First off let me explain, I am a schoolteacher at a small high school south of Dallas, TX, USA.

One day, I wore a particular pair of slack pants that had a zipper in the back that went right down the buttocks area.

Well, about halfway through the class, I took a book around the class to show each student. Suddenly, I heard gasps and whispers coming from behind me.

I simple ignored them and continued to walk around the class showing the book to everyone. Little did I know I was also showing them my ass.

My zipper had came unzipped and all I had on underneath were see-through panty hose. I was mortified. I zipped it up quickly and walked out of the classroom to regain my composure.

This is truly the most embarrassing story ever!

Submitted By Emily

Movie Theater Event
As a teenager I went to the movie theater by myself thinking I would be asserting my independence. As we all know women do not like to be alone in social situations. But this was going to be different. After the movie started I decided I wanted refreshments. Upon returning with my popcorn and coke I located my seat. As I crossed the row to my seat I had to pass in front of a man--and he did not make it easy. I tried my best to step in front of him, but I tripped over his feet and landed in his lap!! I didn't even spill my popcorn, but was so embarrassed that I had landed in his lap. I got up and sat in my seat further down the row, but I have no idea about the rest of the movie. The guy I landed on watched me through the whole movie, so I was watching him so I could make my getaway if need be. I have never went to a movie by myself since!! It is just a recipe for disaster.

Submitted by Sandra

Ice Cubes
I was giving a seminar at a medical place and I kept a container of flat ice cubes nearby for my sore throat. Before anyone came in the room I took a gulp and chomped on a few cubes.    Everyone filled the room and I introduced myself and continued on.   I felt something cool on my pocket of my breast and here an ice cube had slipped out of the cup into the pocket and as I was talking the wet circle got rounder and rounder......oh was I embarrassed!!!

Submitted by Lynn H.

Wedding Comment
My husband and I were at a wedding, and the brides mother was an unusually large, homely, unkempt woman...no matter what she wore or how she did her hair she couldn't help but look horrid. I wanted to say to her upon shaking hands in the receiving line.... You really look nice, as I know she spent some time trying her best and it was worth the effort as she did look reasonably nice. I was all ready in the line and as I took her hand...   Instead of saying "You really look nice" I blurted out... "You even look nice"   My husband got me in the parking lot and said Why would you say such a thing!!! I said I feel horrible enough lets just go home...This was over 30 years ago and to this day I still wish I could redo that moment. She was busy greeting other people so I hope she didn't really comprehend it. Sometimes the brain disengages from the mouth!!!

Submitted by Lynn H.

Gymnastic Mistake
When I was about 10 yrs. old my gymnastics building was very small and had very low ceilings. I was on the high bar and was attempting a flyaway move, when I went over the bar my foot stuck straight in the ceiling and there I stayed until every one in the gym had got a good laugh and several pictures.

Submitted by Heather

ymahmood said:

SALL Says,
ooooooooo
i looooooooove girafffffffffes

You mean you love Uncle TARAR ?

very very and very baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad

Thanks

apni bewi ko make up kay baghari dekh liya hai

patang baz sajna

Mall Kissing
I am 13 and I was going out with this guy. His name was Derek. We were at the mall and I was sitting with him and we would start kissing and then stop and talk and then kiss and then stop......and do on and so on. sooo.....We were kissing and all of a sudden my grandma and my mom came up and saw us! She walked up and said "having fun" and she is young so I thought it was one of my friends and I said yes! Then I looked up and said do you want to join because me and my friends are silly like that. I noticed it was my mom!! I was so embarrassed! My mom and grandma still make fun o me today!

Submitted by Lisa

Thanks