Mental Capacity Test
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "professional". Scroll down for each answer.




The questions are not that difficult.









Questions:

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
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The correct answer is:
Open the refrigerator door, put in the giraffe and close the door.

This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

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2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
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Wrong Answer:
Open the refrigerator door, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator.

Correct Answer:
Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.

This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.

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3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one.
Which animal does not attend?
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Correct Answer:
The Elephant.
The Elephant is in the refrigerator.
This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities.
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4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?
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Correct Answer:
You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.

This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
According to Andersen Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong.
But many preschoolers got several correct answers.
AndersonConsulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.

tarash said:

tarar786 said:

Thanks all of u. Sall I was busy dear with my family. and Friend-16 ji it is complete now. I love all of u dears. esp girls.

tarar ji hamara kya kasoor hai

hahahahahah

fine

Mushy, who had been away on an official trip in a small town, got a message from his ministry that his trip has been prolonged for an extra month.

He was already getting bored with the town. It seemed as if they rolled up the streets and turned out the lights by ten o'clock and over the course of the extra month he was getting very homesick.

Finally, he gave in to temptation and visited the local brothel on the outskirts of town. He entered and handed the madam thousand rupees and requested, "Can you give me the worst performing, most lethargic, disinterested whore in the house."

The madam says, "Well yes, but for this kind of money, you can have the best we have if you like."

"No, no," says Mushy, "you don't understand, actually I'm not horny, I'm just homesick."

A guy walked into his friend's office, he found him sitting at his desk, looking very depressed.

"Hey, what's up with you?", he asks.

"Oh, its my wife," replied the man sadly. "She's hired a new secretary for me."

"Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette?"

"Neither, He's bald."
_________________

An Arab diplomat visiting the U.S. for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water.
Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed.The Emir was angry and shouted " Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water?"

." A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One," stammered the wretched Abdul, "white man sit on well." ( the sh*t pot ! )

A supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts, and a woman I know intended to stock up.

At the store, however, she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portions of the poultry, so she complained to the butcher. "don't worry, ya ," he said. "I'll pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping."

Several aisles later, my friend heard the butcher's voice boom over the public-address system: "Will the lady who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store."

Trash ji kiyoon naheen very funny and tasty.

      

Thanks all of u. Sall I was busy dear with my family. and Friend-16 ji it is complete now. I love all of u dears. esp girls.

The new Men's Thesaurus - on sale now at your local book stores!:

"I'M GOING FISHING"
Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid,and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."

IT'S A GUY THING"
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical".

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Means: "I have no idea how it works."

"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Means: "Are you still talking?"

"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."

"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".
Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."

"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely
clueless."

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Means: "What did you catch me at?"

"I HEARD YOU."
"I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."

Terrible cold

When Pat and Mike met each other on the street one day, Pat noticed that
Mike had a terrible cold. "Have you seen a doctor about that cold?" he
asked.

"No," said Mike, "But I probably should. Do you know a good doctor?" Pat
gave him the name of his own doctor and assured him that he'd be in good
hands.

About a week later, they met again and Pat wasn't sure if the cold was
really better. "Did you see my doctor?" Pat inquired.

"Oh, yeah," Mike replied. He was a really nice guy!"

"Well, did he give you something to help your cold"?

"Sure did!" Mike answered, somewhat enthusiastically. "He told me to
drink a big glass of fresh orange juice after a hot bath."

"Well, did it help?" Pat asked hesitantly.

"How do I know?" Mike retorted. "I haven't even finished drinking the bath yet.

One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine
when he saw two men eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver
to stop and he got out to investigate.

"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.

"Oh, well, you can come with me to my house," instructed the lawyer.

"But, sir, I have a wife and two kids with me!"

"Bring them along!" said the lawyer. He turned to the other man and
said, "You come with us, too."

"But, Sir, I have a wife and six kids!" he answered.

"Bring them as well!" answered the lawyer, as he headed for his limo.

They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as
large as the limousine. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says,
"Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll love my place. THE GRASS IS
ALMOST A FOOT TALL!"

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both
of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are
hurt.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man,
That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's
nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we
should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of
our days".

Flattered, the man replied, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely!" "This
must be a sign from God!"

The woman continued, "and look at this, here's another miracle. My car
is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely
God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then
she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement,
opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.
The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and
hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" The woman replies, "No. I think
I'll just wait for the police...."

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Women are clever. Don't mess with them.

Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients on the
operating table.

The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating
table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything
inside them is color coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best,
everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in, "You know, I like construction workers,
those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the
end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, "You're all
wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no
heart, and no spine, and the head and the ass are interchangeable."

wonderful

Queen ji aap ki post ki how 80 percent post mere topic, fun hi fun mein already posted hain.